I wrote this article with a wink. You might recognize yourself in some parts. My intention is not to judge, shame, or lecture anyone.\n\nAt the end of the article, I share how I personally handle this topic\u2014but that is by no means the \u201cbest\u201d way, just the one that feels right for me. Whatever works for your family is fantastic. Do your thing!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Right now it\u2019s Fasching season in Germany\u2014also known as Fasenacht or Carnival. Anyone who wants to can dress up, and of course that includes the kids. It\u2019s a huge amount of fun for young and old alike\u2014but also another item on the never-ending to-do list of chronically overworked parents in this country. And naturally, it\u2019s another opportunity for parents to try to outdo each other.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
You can buy countless costumes ready-made. Some kids love to dressing up as their favorite superhero all year long, so for Fasching they just pull the current favorite costume from the closet.
\n\nBut there are also parents like me, who (in theory) feel the need to design, sew, craft, and even do makeup for a new costume every single year. The goal is for the child to be happy and look amazing. And, if I\u2019m honest, we also secretly hope that the teachers at kindergarten, grandma and grandpa, and of course the neighbors will finally see and appreciate how creative and clever we are.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sounds exhausting and not very clever? Yep, that\u2019s exactly right.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Kids are just kids. In theory, they\u2019re adorable and an endless source of joy. In reality, they have their own thoughts and feelings\u2014and sometimes they\u2019re clumsy. The costume is already broken before the party<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Fasching is exciting for children, and some can\u2019t wait to put on their new costume. They immediately step into their role, acting like a sword-wielding knight, a fluttering butterfly, or a pirouetting ballerina. Costumes for children need to be sturdy and allow movement. Otherwise there\u2019s a crash\u2014the first seam rips, or the handmade cardboard sword bends before the noble knight even sets foot in kindergarten. Later, the kindergarten photos show a sad princess\u2014without her crown.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The costume isn\u2019t right<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n You spent days at the sewing machine finishing the long-awaited light-blue princess dress. But on Fasching morning, the child suddenly wants to be a ladybug. Tough luck for everyone involved. There\u2019s no quick alternative costume, and the child doesn\u2019t shine the way mom had imagined.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The costume doesn\u2019t look like expected<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n During brainstorming, parent and child were fully aligned. The child wanted to be a hero from their favorite series. Mom immediately had ideas for how to make it happen. Dad fired up the 3D printer for cool equipment. This costume would be amazing.\n\nBut on Fasching morning, the child spots a ready-made costume in the supermarket and insists that only that costume truly represents their hero. Again, no glowing child.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The child modifies the costume<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n We want kids to have their own ideas and be creative. So we put them in our homemade bunny costume and feel a little proud that it actually works this time. But then the child confidently adds a wizard hat and an apron. They wear the hat all day, and nobody sees the bunny ears. At least the child beams with pride. <\/p>\n\n\n\n The child doesn\u2019t want to dress up at all<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Maybe you planned the costume together with the child, maybe they even helped craft it. On Fasching morning, you get up extra early to allow enough time to dress up. And then the child stands there with drooping arms and a shy look. Courage has left them\u2014they just want to be themselves.\n\nOf course, no child should be forced to dress up. Dad hangs the costume on the kindergarten coat rack, just in case. Other children ask, \u201cWhat are you dressed as?\u201d \u201cWhy aren\u2019t you in costume?\u201d The child experiences exactly the attention they were afraid of. Resisting social expectations is a huge effort\u2014and it\u2019s part of growing up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n These \u201ccostume disasters\u201d stand in for everything we make for our little ones. They show that our romanticized vision of handmade often doesn\u2019t match reality. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Knitting, sewing, crocheting\u2014all take not only materials but also time, which is a rare commodity for many parents. When I knit something for my child, I do it in my scarce free time, and it costs extra energy to avoid linking this \u201csacrifice\u201d to expectations of gratitude from the child. I secretly hope for recognition and appreciation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The child doesn\u2019t understand this. They might even see the knitting needles as competition for my attention. They don\u2019t want a special sweater to handle carefully\u2014they\u2019d rather play \u201cMom, Dad, and Child\u201d with me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n So if, in the end, everyone makes long faces and the sweater sits in the wardrobe until the child finally outgrows it, it\u2019s simply not worth it. It\u2019s perfectly fine to spend your time differently. There are countless ways to create lasting memories with your children.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Do you want to use your free time meaningfully? Do you want recognition from neighbors? Or even from your child?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Are these really the right goals for stressed parents? Just make yourself a coffee and look out the window. That\u2019s okay. You\u2019re doing enough. You are enough.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Even though I\u2019ve experienced almost all of the above real-life disasters, for me making things for my children still pays off. I\u2019ve long reduced my expectations (a new top costume every year). My costumes are minimalist, often styled from everyday objects in the morning, and work without makeup. I don\u2019t invest much time in something that will only be worn for a few hours.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But<\/strong> I do invest time in things that last longer and create lasting memories. I don\u2019t just make decorations and accessories\u2014I also pass on values and skills.<\/p>\n\n\n\n My mother knitted a big blanket for us. I remember playing with it under the cherry tree in the garden. That is actually one of my favorite childhood memories.\nI had knitted sweaters and cute, self-sewn pillows and curtains for my room. Not everything was painstakingly handmade, but I was always surrounded by things my mother had made, and I watched how she made or repaired them. That shaped me and motivated me to knit and sew myself. I want to pass that on to my children. Luckily, my husband brings many skills too, which he also shares with our kids. Our children can choose from a colorful mix of handicrafts and trades.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The Baby Bag Finea<\/a> and and Curved Baby Blanket Lorenz<\/a> were made during my first pregnancy. Both children were wrapped in them as babies. They stayed warm, and I felt pride and care. Even with all this engagement for my children, it\u2019s important that I also find time to knit or crochet for myself. That carries an important, maybe even the most important, message: it\u2019s okay to think of yourself and bring yourself joy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Do you knit or crochet for your children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or your friends\u2019 kids? I\u2019d love to hear about it in the comments.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" My personal opinion<\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":245,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[15,18,5,17],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-556","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog-beitraege","category-crochet","category-meinungen","category-stricken"],"yoast_head":"\nTheory vs. Reality<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
oft<\/s> machmal sind sie ungeschickt.<\/p>\n\n\n\nWhy it\u2019s okay not to knit for your child<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Why I still make things for my children<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
In the play kitchen, crocheted ingredients are used for cooking. The children learn that you don\u2019t always have to buy everything\u2014you can make something useful from scraps. Perhaps that colorful crocheted fruit will be a cherished memory for them, just as the blanket under the cherry tree was for me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n